Za vse gurmane: semen-o-lada :)

Posted: 26/07/2011 in Prehrana, Splošno, Zajebancija

Dragi bralci, preljube bralke,

ste naveličani svoje vsakdanje kuhe in si želite česa novega? Zakaj ne bi pokukali v knjižico Natural Harvest – A Collection of Semen-Based Recipes in si pripravili kakšne na človeškem semenu bazirajoče dobrote? OMG, he said semen! Poglejmo, kaj lepega o svoji knjigi pove njena avtorica, Fotie Photenhauer:

Semen is not only nutritious, but it also has a wonderful texture and amazing cooking properties. Like fine wine and cheeses, the taste of semen is complex and dynamic. Semen is inexpensive to produce and is commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants. Despite all of these positive qualities, semen remains neglected as a food. This book hopes to change that. Once you overcome any initial hesitation, you will be surprised to learn how wonderful semen is in the kitchen. Semen is an exciting ingredient that can give every dish you make an interesting twist. If you are a passionate cook and are not afraid to experiment with new ingredients – you will love this cook book!

In kaj pravijo uporabniki (poglejmo nekaj naključnih citatov):

Long Suppressed Culinary History” Many peoples are ignorant of the long history of cuisine utilizing seminal and/or vaginal fluids. My doctoral dissertation at the Free University of Budapest was entitled “Carnal Cuisine: An Examination of Semenophagy and Related Culinary Practices in Pre-Christian European Cultures”. Unfortunately, this is the only comprehensive work I know to document the extensive history of ritual semen consumption in early Central European cooking, but it has not yet been translated into English. Hopefully your book will spark a revival of interest in the traditional use of sexual fluids in cooking as well as in those scrumptious semen and vaginal juice pastries so popular today in some rural parts of the continent.

***

I just started cooking with this book, And I think it is the most unique book in my large erection. I soon mentioned it to a few close friends and got them quite “involved” (if you will). I found it rather hard….. to keep up with tugging one out every time I want a pan cake. So my friends and I decided to add a new spice to the spice rack. Now i can cook with seaman all the time. I wonder if other seaman has different flavors. Elephant, Crocodile, Dogs, hrmm… What about races? ooohhh…. Indian curry jizz chicken sounds decadent or Asian Cock Suey mmmm… delectable.

100% top-šit eko in organsko (OK, odvisno od življenjskega sloga in načina prehranjevanja glavnega vira). Skratka: njami-njami, to je priložnost, da postanete sperm-o-gurmani.  🙂

P.S. Če ste dotični prispevek vzeli preveč resno, poprosite svojega najboljšega prijatelja/prijateljico, da vam pred glavo podrži stisnjeno pest svoje močnejše roke (v večini primerov bo to desnica – vem, ful sem faca, ker podajam vse te detajle ;)), nato pa se primerno samokaznujte: to najelegantnejše storite tako, da glavo nalahno nagnete nazaj, potem pa se z njo vsaj 10x z maksimalno hitrostjo zabijete v predočeno pest. (ajd, jaće!)

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